Motherhood

To be honest, it really isn't what I imagined it to be.

When I was pregnant with the boys I thought about all the fun things we were going to do: playing in the snow, making crafts, having them help me with dinner, going to the park, cuddling and watching movies, and the list could go on.

I never stopped to think about the tantrums, the incessant whining, the schedules, the meals, the mess, the disobedience.

Then my two miracles arrived and all of the sudden I realized how much work and sacrifice comes with being a mom.

(This is where you should call your mom and thank her for everything she has ever done for you)

I knew that it isn't always fun and that it would be hard at times, but it was much more so than I expected.

Some days I find myself wondering if we will all survive to the end of day. Some days I think I might actually be going crazy. Some days I just want to cry and pout just like my boys. Some days I just want a babysitter to come over and watch the boys while I go on a shopping spree. Some days I want this never-ending job to just give me a short break. Some days I feel like pulling all my hair out. Some days I feel like a really mean mom.

But...

Everyday those smiles melt my heart. Everyday those cuddles and kisses and little voices saying "Mommy" mend my soul. Everyday I can choose to have joy amongst the chaos. Everyday the laughs, the playing, the really good moments turn into priceless memories. Everyday all these things outweigh all the sacrifices and all the work.

I've learned a lot about myself since having kids. I always thought I was a pretty patient person and that I could tolerate pretty much anything. I was so wrong. It's amazing to me how God uses our children to teach us, to draw us closer to Him, to develop good character, to grow.

Motherhood changes you.

I can now multitask like never before. I can juggle 30 different things all while trying to get two boys out the door. I can change diapers in my sleep. I start crying whenever something touches my heart while my husband looks at me like I'm a little crazy. (seriously, I was watching "Up" with the boys they other day and cried about 3 different times). I can take care of two children after a sleepless night with only having coffee as my aid.

I've also had to learn how to rely on God for strength, pray through tough days, give thanks in all circumstances. I've gained a deeper understanding of God's unending love for us, His amazing grace, His constant presence.

Motherhood is so worth it. Every hard day, every heartache, every frustration.

Our job is so important. We are enough. We are the perfect moms for our kids. God is using us in the mundane ordinary days. We have a purpose. We are all in this Mom thing together.

To all my fellow moms, You Got This!